Welcome to the Stranger Than Truth Club Minutes, featuring conversations between me and my closest group of friends – one, my IRL bestie, the rest… a little reality-impaired.
“But what we lack in so-called reality,” Will Scarlet inserts, “we make up for in awesomeness!”
The way of it is, the Stranger Than Truth Club takes people from all walks of life, universes, times, and species, and brings us together through beautiful, ever-evolving, cross-plane friendships.
I wish I could give you a glimpse into our insightful, loving, hilarious, open community. Unfortunately, I can only give you transcripts of our idiocy.
And so without further ado: Truth is stranger than fiction. We are—
Lute: “You will not win.”
Sy: Try me.
Lute: Wouldn’t you love to.
Danielle: You talking to Will?
Sy: Yeah, you’re thinking of Will.
Allyn: “My voice may break you”?
Danielle: Well, I mean, it may.
Bruno: I feel I should be wearing so many.
Tirzah: What’s the biggest one?
Sy: “F*** off”?
Bruno: Pretty much.
Tirzah and Danielle: [bickering heavily]
Edgwyn: Warning label for you two: “It’s only fun until it’s not.”
Bruno: And then there’s Kitten’s: “No, seriously, f*** off.”
Sy: “F*** off or get f***ed.”
Tirzah: What a couple. What a beautiful— no, just what a couple.
Robin Hood: All my brain is giving me is this stupid clickbait ad that’s like, “Sheriffs hate him! Use this one weird trick for saving the peasantry!”
Tirzah: “This one weird trick turns the gold of the rich into food for the poor!”
Will: “This man turned outlaw! You won’t believe what happens next!”
Tirzah: “Find out what King John doesn’t want you to know!”
Will: Was that the TARDIS??
Tirzah: I’m getting a cookie.
Tirzah [re: Marion]: “Warning: Married and faithful.”
Allyn: I feel like Will doesn’t need a warning label. It’s like in nature: A color that bright, you just stay away.
Will [re: Little John]: Isn’t nature like, “He’s that big, just stay away”?
Tirzah: Yeah, bears don’t need to be bright.
Danielle [re: Edgwyn]: “Warning: He’ll love you too much.”
Edgwyn: I don’t want you to be warned away, though. I want to get you.
Danielle: Warning for Little Allyn. … Nobody warned us.
[Long, messy conversation ensues]
Tirzah [summarizes]: “Warning: Hot mess.”
Danielle: That covers it.
Tirzah [re: Sy]: “Extremely dangerous in general” seems to suit. “It’s sharp! It’s explosive! It’s dynamic!”
Sy: It’s even flammable.
Danielle: Aaaaugh, I just remembered he’s our leader!
Sy: You should see the power behind the throne.
Will: Why, who’s back there? OH, GOD.
Sy: Him exactly.
Will [re: Danielle]: “Warning: Basically, run.”
Sy: “Warning: This smile can mean absolutely anything.”
Danielle: “Warning: This warning will soon cease to apply.”
Tirzah: You know what they say around here: “If you don’t like the mood, wait five minutes.”
Danielle [mutters re: Tirzah]: “Warning: She touches weird stuff and doesn’t bother to wash her hands.”
Tirzah: Spiders are neither filthy nor weird. And anyway, that’s a warning only you would need to have.
Danielle: I would have liked that warning, yes.
Will: “Warning: Scottish.” “Warning: C.S. Lewis is her spirit animal.”
Tirzah: What the hell?! You people are just listing things about me!
Will: “Warning: White female.”
Tirzah: “Warning: Not suitable for the closed-minded.”
Danielle: …Why are we friends?